Thursday, April 10, 2008
I'd do the whole Stephen Colbert "I called it!" act if I wasn't so pissed off. Thank you, universe, what lesson was it you were trying to teach me today? Give up, get ten more cats, cuz you're going to be alone the rest of your life? People let you down? As soon as you open up and reach out you are going to get hurt? I would like a break, universe, from all these lessons. Or maybe the lesson is that this is just how life is, so don't take it so personally. I don't know. I'm crying now, universe, hope you are happy.
Well, it is five o'clock, and I have not heard from R. I have this feeling he is going to let me down today. It would just be the perfect culmination of this whole effing thing. I'm trying not be be so fatalistic, but I know my luck, I know how the universe makes things go for me. I already feel like crap today, nothing like a kick in the head to make it official. I still feel so tired and emotionally raw. I think I'm just going to have to have a nap, and hope for the best. On the positive side, I finally got some stuff done that I have been putting off, like my taxes. I've been too tired to eat, again. Yes, I think a nap is definitely called for. Daisy, wanna nap with mummy? Yeahhhhhhhh.
I sometimes write things that I don't really mean or believe. These are not to be taken literally, nor as definitive statements about me or my beliefs. Thoughts and emotions are transient, and I reserve the right to change my mind, generalize, exaggerate, give strong opinions, or write other possibly offensive statements. I don't lie, but I may say something that's not true to check whether I believe it or not, or to make a point. Call it creative license. This is my blog, and do have the right to say what I want. I'm using it in creatively therapeutic ways. Whatever the reader may think of me and my words, please believe that my core intentions are always good and I never willingly hurt anyone.